Same song, next verse, a little bit louder…

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Welcome back to my little corner of the web!

This week’s snippet picks up a little bit after last week’s (sorry about the creative punctuation, try to squint a little when you read it!). Oly offered to tell their dad about the locker defacing incident but Psyche only needs his support, not his voice. This one has a lot of names in it, so here’s a rundown:

  • Psyche is our 16 y/o protag
  • Ivar and Olander (Oly) are her older, identical twin, brothers
  • I guess Dad is probably obvious.  (He was beating cake batter when she entered the kitchen.) 🙂

Psyche squared her shoulders and held Oly’s hand tighter. “I didn’t deface my locker for nothing, someone wrote single on it, I just smeared it until I could go back and clean it up.”

Psyche watched closely as her dad’s muscular arm slowed to a stop. She jumped when Ivar brought both hands down flat on the counter with a loud slap.

“Who did it?”

Before she could say she didn’t know, Ivar turned to his father.

“She shouldn’t even be at that school, she needs to go back on-site where she belongs.”

“SHE is right here and SHE can speak for herself, Igor, and SHE is not going back there.”

Thanks for reading!

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Don’t forget to hop around and check out the rest of the snippets! The Snippet Sunday group is amazing, and you’re bound to find something cool on the list at Weekend Writing Warriors!

 I got the kindest, most helpful rejection for this story last week. I’ve been working to implement one of the editor’s suggestions so maybe I’m one step closer to getting it published, and not one step closer to papering my bathroom with rejections! *fingers crossed*

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18 responses

  1. Great snippet! One question, though. Is “Igor” a typo or younger sister’s annoying pet name for an older brother?

    March 1, 2014 at 9:42 pm

    • Thanks! Well, I wouldn’t exactly call it a pet name, but you’re on the mark with annoying. 🙂

      March 2, 2014 at 1:30 am

  2. True, she can speak for herself and I would love to hear what she has to say. And also where is back there?

    March 2, 2014 at 4:13 am

  3. Attention-getting snippet. As others have said – she can speak for herself and where is “back there”? Nicely done.

    March 2, 2014 at 6:22 am

  4. Ugh, I HATE when the men talk around the woman like she’s not there. Good for her, standing up for herself! Love this exchange. It’s very natural.

    March 2, 2014 at 7:42 am

    • I know, right?! She’s a tough cookie and doesn’t stand for that talking-around stuff.
      Thanks for commenting! 🙂

      March 2, 2014 at 1:01 pm

  5. Love Psyche–can’t read to read more…and glad she told off those pesky brothers.

    March 2, 2014 at 8:15 am

  6. Really enjoyed this little snippet of conversation, the family dynamics, the hint of a fascinating back story – well done!

    March 2, 2014 at 10:44 am

    • Thanks, Veronica! From your lips to an editor’s ear…or something like that. 🙂

      March 2, 2014 at 12:58 pm

  7. I like Psyche—she has determination. Question (because I can’t remember if you mentioned it): does the school’s admin know what was scrawled on her locker? Is she facing bullying peers AND adults? Or is “single” something that the school wouldn’t see as a taunt or threat?

    March 2, 2014 at 12:06 pm

    • Thanks, Sarah! Well, let’s just say this principal isn’t exactly who she seems to be…

      March 2, 2014 at 12:57 pm

  8. Sounds like her brothers are looking out for her, which is nice, but they do need to let her speak for herself. I’m glad she does! I’m curious about her change of schools — why? And what’s going on at the new one.

    March 2, 2014 at 1:01 pm

  9. This snippet makes me wonder what’s so bad about ‘single.’ It has to be something terrible, the way they’re reacting.

    Love her refusal to be talked about as if she wasn’t present!

    March 2, 2014 at 2:07 pm

  10. Interesting that the father, though he seems to be standing up for Psyche’s right to speak for herself, does not speak to her.

    March 2, 2014 at 2:49 pm

  11. Pingback: History from a father’s point of view… | Charli Green: YA LGBT Fiction, Books for the Bs

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